Our Last Day

Today was our last day in our home of four years.

Our home where we have
added four children to our family,
celebrated birthdays,
started a tradition of having a family slumber party in the living room on New Year's Eve,
grieved a lost baby,
put countless hours of love into the landscaping where there once was none,
bandaged boo-boos,
made so many sweet friends,
had five pets (Charles and Hippopotamus have since found other families, and Dinah went to kitty heaven, but we still have old Calvin and Molly Brown),
worked through trauma,
caught fireflies,
fought,
stayed up late canning jams and tomato sauce,
painted a whole wall with chalkboard paint,
read the first five Harry Potter books,
almost lost Jude a few times when he got out of the yard or window,
rode bikes and had family fun runs around the parking lot,
worshipped together,
watched our kids grow by the foot and blossom into awesome little people,
and so much more.

Josh summed it up well this morning with this meme:

We are equally excited about the next steps that God is leading us to take, and deeply grieving the loss of our church, friends, and home here. I'm trying to teach our kids that it's okay to hold both of those things in our hands at the same time, that feeling one doesn't mean we aren't allowed to feel the other. And I'm trying to remind myself of the same thing.

Please pray for us tomorrow as we move and settle into a new home and life.

Pastor Appreciation Month

I'm sitting in my living room on the last Sunday morning of October. I've been sick all week, and although I'm hopefully on the mend now, I'm still not feeling well enough to get myself and 5 kids ready for church plus wrangle them all in the pew for an hour.

So instead of being in church, I'm sitting here thinking about the man across the parking lot who is at this moment about to preach his heart out to a church full of people whom he loves dearly.

Most people will never see the inside view of the lives of pastors, but I do. At least this one. And he is the most hardworking, self-disciplined person I have ever met. He pours his life out for his family, his church, and his studies without ever expecting praise or notice. He works so hard for the church and his Ph.D studies, and somehow still manages to be more involved at home than I think is common.

He is meek and humble in ways that my strong-willed personality struggles to comprehend.

Shaving his head at the end of VBS, because the kids met the missions goal.

He loves the world and the gospel, and constantly strives to lead our church and our family toward ways that we can reach out both in our community, our country, and our world.

He is not perfect, of course, but he is still pretty darn great. I'm so thankful that I get to sit under the teaching and pastoral care of my own dear husband. And I just felt inclined to let him know, on this last Sunday of Pastor Appreciation Month, how much he is appreciated... at least by the frazzled lady who is usually in the second row with all of those crazy kids.

Malawi Famine Relief

$20 is pocket change for most of us in middle class America. I know that my family spends more than that on one fast food meal.

But for a family in Malawi, $20 per month for the next year will mean the difference between living and dying. 

Droughts and floods have combined in the past year to completely devastate crops in the southern region of Malawi, and the people are already beginning to go hungry.  Most people in the villages are subsistence farmers who only eat what they can grow, and some may grow a little extra to sell at the market. But if the crops don't grow, they have neither food nor money to buy food.

A man stands in his corn field that hasn't produced any ears of corn this year because of the drought.

   
Eric and Stephanie Chapman are our friends and missionaries in Malawi. They work with around 200 village churches to spread the gospel and train church leaders. Eric has been visiting villages lately, and he has seen that the people are already looking thinner and more sickly because of food shortages.

In one village he visited they were eating wild grass, and in another they were eating a bitter root that has to be cooked 3 times to get the poison out of it or else it will kill them. But the people are starving and desperate. Without relief, many Malawians will die in the coming year, especially children and the elderly.

A bowl of the wild grass that some have gathered to eat. But the grass won't last long now that the rainy season is over.

   
Eric has been praying and talking to people, and he has developed a plan to buy and distribute corn to the believers in the village churches through the pastors.  This is dangerous work, as riots and even murders are not uncommon over food during times of famine. But as he put it in his last newsletter, "how can I turn a blind eye to such a need?"

I'm challenging you to give $20 a month for a year, which will help a family of four in Malawi make it through this next year of famine. 

Many of us can afford to part with more than $20 per month and help multiple families. Please prayerfully consider making this small sacrifice so that others could live.

 
To give, please follow this link to the donate page of Eric & Stephanie's website, EurAsian Baptist Mission. Toward the bottom you will see options for designating your donation, and you'll fill in your donation amount beside "for African Hunger." You can choose to give a one-time gift or a monthly donation from your bank account or credit card.

If you're more old school and would prefer to send a check, you can send it to:
EurAsian Baptist Mission
6847 N. 9th Ave., Suite A #332
Pensacola, FL 32504

EurAsian Baptist Mission is a non-profit organization registered with the state of Florida as a 501(c)3. All gifts are tax deductible, and givers will be sent a receipt by mail or email to be used for tax purposes.

One-time gifts are of course welcome and very helpful, but remember that this is a need that is going to last until the next harvest in April 2017, and a monthly donation of $20 or more is what is most needed.

"What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, 'Go in peace, be warmed and filled,' without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that?" (James 2:14-16 ESV)

Beginning Running When You're Really Out of Shape

Let me just give a little disclaimer at the beginning of this: I know I don't look really out of shape; I'm a pretty healthy weight. But that doesn't mean I'm in good shape, it just means that I was blessed with a good metabolism. Also, I'm clearly not a medical professional, and this is not medical advice.

My husband decided to start running, and went out and ran a mile non-stop on the first day. One of my best friends runs marathons. If you're like either of them, you can just click on to something else. This is for those of us who struggle.

When I first decided I wanted to start running, I thought a couch to 5k program sounded perfect. I downloaded the free Runkeeper app and took off. But this is how out of shape I was: even it was way too hard for me. Talk about discouraging!

So I made up my own program, and slowly but surely I am improving. On my run this morning, I wrote this post in my head to hopefully encourage others who want to start running, but are really out of shape. Here is what is working for me:

1. I got the Runkeeper app and just started doing what they call free runs. It shows you your time and distance and a few other fun things as you run. I started out doing a mile, running for 30 seconds and then walking for 1.5 minutes. And that was really hard for me! I'm serious! Do whatever interval pushes you just enough that you feel challenged, but not so much that you can't sustain it.
2. Once I was doing that okay, I kept at the same interval, but increased to 2 miles. 
3. Once I was doing that okay, I have kept at 2 miles and worked on my speed. I upped to running 1 minute and walking 1.5 minutes, then running 1 minute and walking 1 minute, then running 1.5 minutes and walking 1 minute, and so on. As of this writing, I've recently started running 2 minutes and walking 30 seconds, and it feels so great! It's been fun to stay at the same distance and work on speed, because Runkeeper tells you when you set a new personal record. Boy is that satisfying.
4. At some point, I will increase my distance, too. I haven't decided when I want to do that.

A comparison of my first ever run that I tracked with Runkeeper (top) vs this morning's run (bottom, the grey markers are where I had to pause several times to stop for traffic because it's just a little backroad). It's so fun to see my min/mi go down, down, down, and it motivates me to push myself!

That's probably really basic, but hopefully it will encourage someone. Here are a couple of other things that have really made a difference for me:

• I have a great running partner. Running with my dog, Molly Brown, not only motivates me to get out of the house for her sake, but she is so excited when we go running that she keeps my pace significantly faster than I would run and walk on my own. She is fantastic on a leash and literally drags me along when I am struggling (in a good way). Something about running with her just makes me happy.

Running (actually I was on a walking interval when I snapped this) with Molly Brown.

• I run on a scenic road. I think running anywhere that isn't a track or treadmill is much easier and more interesting, even with all the hills on my road. We got a treadmill last winter and use it when the weather is inclement, but it is SO much harder to go the same distance and pace on it than it is on the road where I have things to look at and distract me from what I'm doing.

• There was a time in my life when my knees hurt so bad from arthritis that I couldn't have dreamed of running. I could hardly walk up stairs when the weather was just right. But I went gluten-free several years ago for other reasons, and one happy side effect of that is that I do not have ANY arthritis anymore. Seriously. None. If arthritis is an issue for you, please consider a gluten-free diet. Even if you aren't medically allergic or sensitive to gluten, it has been proven to cause inflammation in your body. It has been honest-to-goodness life-changing for me.

A beautiful foggy morning on the road where Molly Brown and I run.

So those are my tips from a reformed not-runner! If you are a seasoned runner and actually read this, then after you pick yourself up off the floor from laughing at how out of shape I am, please share any tips you may have for newbies, too!

Update: In case someone stumbles upon this post, I feel obliged to let you know that it turns out I wasn't just really out of shape, I had exercise-induced asthma. Cue the face palm. I didn't know it wasn't normal for your lungs to feel like they were on fire when you ran. I started taking an over-the-counter Bronkaid pill about 15 minutes before running, and I was amazed by how much I could actually run! Added bonus: I also started actually enjoying hiking with my family!

9 Years Ago

9 years ago. He was so young and skinny and shaky and unsure of himself in so many ways. But what won my heart then, and has continued to win me anew every day, was his deep, unwavering commitment to the Lord and to me. Saying yes to him was the second best decision I've ever made (second to saying yes to Jesus, of course).

For our anniversary today, we at least got to get dressed up... to go to court with our three new children. No, it wasn't an exciting court date like finally adopting them, it was just a routine 6 month check-up of sorts with the judge. After lunch, we had homemade cappuccinos, cuddled on the couch, watched an Anthony Bourdain episode from Tanzania, and dreamed of going there for maybe our 20th anniversary. Josh did finally go to his office to work for a few hours, and I played with Jude for a while (while the little two were napping and the oldest was at school) and then finally planted our little garden. Josh made bacon and egg wraps for dinner while I finished up the garden, because I'd forgotten to get any meat out of the freezer to thaw.

In most ways, it wasn't a terribly special day, but (and I know this is totally cheesy and cliche, but it's absolutely true) every day that I get to spend with this husband of mine is a special day. I could not be more thankful for him and the 9 difficult and wonderful years that God has given us together.

Two Years

Two years. Wow. We've lived in this house for two years.

Okay, I know that for most people two years doesn't sound like very long at all. But this is us, we're talking about here. And this is the longest we've lived anywhere in almost nine years of marriage. What? Normal people don't move that often?

In celebration of actually staying put for two whole years, let's take a walk down memory lane and look at all of the places we've lived in the last nine years:

May 2006 - December 2006

One Bedroom Land in Murray, Kentucky

Our first apartment! (If you're familiar with Murray, you probably know of one-bedroom land: a little neighborhood of one-bedroom apartments.) The neighbors' cigarette smoke came through the walls into our closet and made all of our clothes stink, and the dining/office/living room was all one tiny space, but it was our first apartment! We got married, I finished my Bachelor's at Murray State, and then we moved to:

December 2006 - April 2007

Crescent Hill Neighborhood in Louisville, Kentucky

An old house that had been converted into four apartments, this one-bedroom was quirky and drafty and honest-to-goodness had one foot of counter space in the kitchen, but we loved it. Louisville felt so big and lonely, especially on Sundays, but we learned to cling to the Lord and to one another. I had a brief stint as a car salesman, and then Josh was called as pastor of Elk Lick Baptist Church in Owenton, so we moved to:

April 2007 - October 2007

Owenton, Kentucky

We'd planned on buying a house here and putting down roots, but when that fell through, we landed in a steal of a two-bedroom duplex (the apartments were on the second floor), with a wonderful old couple as our neighbors and landlords. Then out of nowhere I was asked to apply for a position at Crossings Ministries in Louisville, which was not only my dream place to work but would also pay a lot more than I was currently making, so I did and we wound up moving back to:

October 2007 - May 2009

Clifton Heights Neighborhood in Louisville, Kentucky

We had the sweetest two-bedroom apartment here, and we loved it so, so very much. This is the apartment where we lived when Jude was born. We drove out to Owenton every Sunday until Josh graduated from Boyce and God called us to move to Moldova for two years as missionaries, so we packed up and moved to:

May 2009 - September 2009

Our Parents' Houses in western Kentucky

(I don't have pictures of our parent's houses, so here's Jude snoozing on my parents' front porch.) We moved back and forth between our parents' houses roughly every two weeks, soaking up as much quality time with our loved ones as possible until the day finally came that we left for:

September 2009 - December 2009

Camp Apartment in Vatici, Moldova

Tucked into the back of the second floor of this building that housed all of the students, it was a welcome and delightful 220 square feet of privacy and autonomy after living out of childhood bedrooms for the last 3 months. There were so many little annoyances about living there (the boys outside our door would wake up Jude during his nap, we rarely had hot water, and the winter brought a constant battle with mold, for starters), but in spite of them all, my heart only wells up with fondness and happy memories when I remember that tiny place. But we didn't get green cards at first, which meant that after 3 months we had to leave the country for 3 months, so off we went back to:

December 2009 - March 2010

Our Parents' Houses in western Kentucky

(Again, no pictures of the outside, so here's Jude and Crider with a baby goat that Mammie brought in the house.) Same as above. These seasons of living with our parents were so hard for me, but it was great to get to spend Jude's first Christmas and birthday with everyone. Finally it was time to move back to:

March 2010 - May 2010

Camp Apartment in Vatici, Moldova

(In the kitchen of the apartment. There's Jude's dresser in the hall.) Same as above. Spring at camp was glorious, and then a family we worked with asked us if we would house and dog sit for them for 8 months while they were in America, so we packed up and moved to:

May 2010 - February 2011

Herndons' House in Orhei, Moldova

Talk about stretching our legs! This was a huge, two-story, six-bedroom house with a walled-in yard. It was wonderful, especially in the winter! A huge kitchen! Fast internet! We loved it. We had a love-hate relationship with their dogs, Peanut and Heidy, but it was slightly more love than hate. But alas, they finally came back and we had to move back to:

February 2011 - June 2011

Camp Apartment In Vatici, Moldova

(Our bedroom could barely fit a full-sized bed, a twin mattress in the floor, and a dresser. The foot of the bed actually stuck out into the doorway a little.) I still only have heart eyes for this little apartment, but after being used to the Herndons' house, moving back here felt more cramped than cozy, especially with Jude getting so much bigger and more active. It was indescribably bittersweet to then move back to America to:

June 2011 - July 2011

Our Parents' Houses in western Kentucky
Good and crazy time catching up, reacclimating, and apartment hunting. We finally found a great place in:

July 2011 - March 2013

Village Manor in Louisville, Kentucky
We settled into a two-bedroom unit in a huge apartment complex near the seminary. We had so many friends there, lots of grassy space for Jude to play, and a large fenced-in playground. By God's mercy, we had a downstairs apartment without anyone living above us for almost the whole time we lived there. The last few months with night-owl, party-animal upstairs neighbors were pretty awful, though. This was such a sweet and hard time for us. After 18 months there, God called Josh to Mt. Tabor Baptist Church, and we moved to:

March 2013 - Present

The Parsonage in Buffalo, Kentucky

Three bedrooms, 1.5 baths, a huge dining room that used to be a car port, and a two-car attached garage. It's practically a castle compared to most of the places we've lived. We could not be more thankful to God for bringing us to this church and this home! This is what it looked like when we moved in. It looks so different now! I wanted to get a "now" picture, but that will have to wait because I'm down with the flu right now.

Our Experience with HBOT & Autism

I know that there are many friends and family members who are eager to hear about our experience with our 30-day hyperbaric chamber rental. Let me start by saying that we are very, very thankful for the opportunity to rent the hyperbaric chamber (hereafter shortened to HBOT, for HyperBaric Oxygen Therapy), and for our generous families for making that possible.

When you start a new intervention that's supposed to help autism, everybody recommends that you only try one thing at a time, so you'll know if it works. While that does make sense, I also feel a sense of urgency to do whatever I can for Jude as soon as I can. So, I'm going to talk a little about all of the things we've been doing lately.

You have to wear an oxygen mask in there to get the benefits from it, which surprised us when it was delivered and set up. Jude hated the mask, so we did all of his sessions at nap and bedtime so I could slip it on once he was asleep.

About the same time we started HBOT, I also started him back on liquid Super Nu Thera. SNT is a multivitamin that has extremely high doses of B-vitamins. Jude takes the one that has the added P-5-P and doesn't have any A or D vitamins in it, since he gets those in his cod liver oil. We saw positive changes in Jude when we tried SNT over the winter, but honestly, it's really gross tasting, he hates it, and I got weary of the daily battle, so I stopped it. After having him back on it for a few weeks, and missing a couple of days here and there for various reasons, I can definitively say that SNT makes the most notable difference in him. Days when he doesn't get it (and especially the second day), he is so much less aware of what's going on around him. Sometimes I give him an extra half-dose in the afternoons and the next day his cognition is even better.

He also started taking a Carlson Cod Liver Oil every day. This was a total accident. He has some kids' fish oil pill that he loves because they are strawberry flavored, and the CLO pills are for me. One day he grabbed one of my CLO pills and gobbled it right up. Since these have more good stuff in them than what he was taking, I happily let him keep taking one every day. We don't see a change in him with CLO, but it is good for everyone to take, so he would be getting it regardless.

About halfway through our HBOT time, we also started him on Fivelac, a second probiotic, as a one-two punch to the yeast overgrowth in his gut. We saw a very mild die-off reaction from the Fivelac (mostly in his diaper), and then some small improvements in his sociability, but it's hard to say which intervention really caused the improvements.

He takes a chewable CoQ10 every morning, and we've also seen a decline in his cognition when he doesn't take it. Not as dramatic as the SNT, but still noticeable. He's been taking CoQ10 for several months, long before we started the HBOT.

Before bed, he takes melatonin to help him get sleepy, two BioKult probiotics opened and mixed into a spoonful of honey, and some liquid Calcium & Magnesium. I take this Cal/Mag, too, since we're both dairy-free, and it's my favorite kind I've found. It tastes good and also includes some Vitamin D and green foods. Taking Cal/Mag before bed also helps you sleep better. That said, I notice that it helps me sleep, but not him.

It's fairly dimly lit in there, but not as dark as this phone pic makes it seem. Also, he isn't wearing the oxygen mask in this pic, which I can tell because he is awake.

Okay. Now that I've gone through everything else he's taking, it's time to discuss the HBOT. Word on the street (okay, the internet) is that most people see improvements around the 20th dive, and another bump in progress around the 30th dive. We didn't notice any differences around these milestones. What we did see were very small, gradual improvements in both his cognition and sociability over the course of the month.

Jude has liked to sing for a long time. He usually has one song in his head that he'll sing for a while (mostly in gibberish, but the tune is clear), and then move on to a different one. In the last couple of weeks, though, he has been pulling up lots of old songs and he's like a little radio station switching between songs! He sings:
This is the Day
School House Polka
I'll Fly Away
Barbara Manatee
and the VeggieTales Theme Song

The most exciting thing for me this month has been that he's started saying, "Mama!" He doesn't use it much, and sometimes he doesn't use it quite right, but he is saying it, and most of the time he does use it right! For probably 2 years now, I've been playing a game with him where I get right in his face (usually when we've been wrestling) and put his hands on his cheeks and say, "Jude," and then move them to my cheeks and say, "Mama." Then, we recently downloaded the free Knock Knock Family app, and customized it with some of our own pictures (my only gripe is that it comes with a dozen or so cartoon people, but you can only add 5 of your own). He loves it and one day he saw my picture and said, "Mama!" Granted, he also said it when he saw Daddy and Tio's pictures, but I'll take it. He's said it several more times, mostly just at my picture, and once even said, "Jude...Mama," while playing the hands-on-cheeks game (though not at the same time as doing the hands).

One improvement that is hard to really quantify is that he just seems more aware and like he understands us better. Sometimes he'll obey things we say that we didn't expect him to understand, or go to something we mention, or respond correctly (by his actions) to what we say. Granted, that is only sometimes. A lot of the time he's still screaming and pulling on us and not understanding the very loving things we are trying to do for him, but sometimes understanding is better than never, so we are encouraged.